(And I’m making a big deal out of it because of my stupidity and carelessness. Ergo, rule number 1: Always follow the instructions during exams. I hate life.)

Que horror.

“no solution means a three-point deduction.” 

Goodbye, 27 points.

It’s not that I don’t get enough hours of sleep—or worst case scenario, none at all; or my incapability to finish that fantasy novel I’ve been reading for almost 4 months now, or see my favorite series.

It is the time of the year when history practically repeats itself. The time when the access to freedom is temporarily lost. It is when the pressure triples itself, and feels like burning charcoal on your skin. The next two weeks are going to be emotional inferno built on golden priorities, hard work, determination, and self-control. It is going to be a full mental stress; a chain of overlapping deadlines, an unending series of bargaining and arguing. Bodies are put on a physical test pumped by anything that is rich in caffeine, or salt, or sugar. It is the fundamental academic loony bin minus the red marks and bad output.

Two weeks. Two weeks and everything will be changed.

As of the moment, the only thing I could reward myself is a neat nail cut and a warm bath. Nothing else follows. Let’s all welcome this year’s bawal-maging-tao season with a bang.

In my twenty years of existence (nuks!), I have always assumed that my parents were never really the best people to talk to whenever shitty stuff are happening with my life. Sometimes, I figure things out by myself through exploration, or by merely being strong. I guess it’s one of the reasons why I’m not fully dependent with people, although I’m surrounded by tons of them. I quite learned the art of managing and carrying myself wisely despite personal insecurities and challenges.

We just had an open forum tonight because there are a few important issues we need to discuss altogether as a family. It was nice to know that we have to gather up (even though I’m dead tired soon as I got home from school) and sit together as we talk about some stuff. It’s not really a big deal; pardon my blabbering but its main premise has something to do with our futures. I appreciated my parents’ efforts to open up the seemingly bearable stuff. Even though we’re faced with responsibilities as their children (i.e. please them with good grades, or be good a sheep to them), I finally understood why they set high expectations to us.

Although the talk was condescending and dragging, I could say that it was dynamic too. I learned new things, and realized my shortcomings. I know I could be really indifferent about them issues most of the times, and I don’t want my parents worrying about the petty burdens concerning my sibs (i.e. my bro’s ugly girlfriend and pseudo-rebellion, or my sis’ bitchiness). I’m glad to the universe this talk happened.

Also, I was asked by dad if I smoke. I didn’t see the question coming ergo I was caught off guard. Apparently our helper saw me smoking yesterday and told mom about it. I laid the answer out, and didn’t get pissed because there’s no point in denying it. Anyway, it was followed with another bigger question: ‘how often do you smoke?’ I answered ‘whenever I’m stressed.’ At the end of it, things were okay. My parents are okay with it too; they just don’t want me to be really abusive with cigarettes because of its negative side effects to the human body. Apparently they don’t want me dead or sick because of lung cancer or whatever. Sayang naman daw ang investment nila sa akin. I love them.

reyvan:

It’s funny how one person can either make or break your day. One moment you’re all happy and giddy then the next thing you know is your heart’s breaking when someone does something you don’t want to see.

“And there will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears; and love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.”

• Went to school 3 hours earlier today for my OrCom105 (Dynamics of Public Relations) meeting with my groupmates. We’re building another PR plan for high school students which is going to be very tedious and time consuming in the forth coming days since it covers 30% (I think) of our final grade.
• Arielle, Cara, Gaile, Marlo, and I had lunch at Mexicalli while talking about the feast of the Nazareno, and those trending topics on Twitter last night like #conyoproblems, #middleclassprobless etc. Of course we also did some sort of mocking at things that make us laugh like hungry hyenas while waiting for our cheese fries, and beef taco rice.
• Puffed some sticks with Arielle and Cara after the meeting. From Marlboro Black/Lights, we’re doing Dunhill Frost now. May budget eh.
• Went to CAS at 4 to attend our OrCom109.2 (Quantitative Research Methods) class. Had a relatively easy time answering his quiz since we just have to identify the variables from sample research problems. 
• We had a reporting and discussion about experimental design, and internal validity. Qualitative research used to be my niche but now, I’m starting to like qualitative research as I discover its beauty. HAHA, really! The assigned reporter didn’t get to finish with her report so that means, my report on factorial, and quasi-experimental design will be moved on Friday next week. It means that I have more time to do necessary tasks for my org and school (e.g. AdHere stuff and other project proposals, and study for Stat class).
• Epic question of the day: Ano ang mas masarap na palaman ng SkyFlakes? Guava jelly, guava jam, o guava marmalade? (Villar, 2012).
• Anyway, Gaile and I went to TriNoma. We’re supposed to just have dinner at BonChon but there’s no room for us, so we went to Taco Bell. 
• Chanced upon Eryka, a good friend from high school, before going home. It’s been almost a year since I last saw her.
• Got to run some errands tonight. My OrCom105 groupmates and I are meeting tomorrow. It’s nice to know we’ve chosen high schools from QC because they’re just near to Cubao, Maginhawa, and Katiputan. We have more chance to lax and troll because Quezon City is the best place to be. HAHA.
• The universe has a surprising way of bringing people from the past back to our lives. Today was weird and delightful.